musings at mum's. .

After four long months of sticking close to married life today I am on leave.. In fact for the past two days I hv wound up from marital office.. Its dark and gloomy in the otherwise hot Chennai.. I wonder why nature seems to be my soul mate in everything I do..she mourns for me.. she feels happy for me.. she knows what to give me.. And she knows I love surprises.. Cosy and comfortable at mum's place I get up when I want to.. I eat food without worrying about giving it to someone else first..the best thing is i dont have to cook what i dont like..I get what I want from where I sit or sleep.. I give complete rest to my tongue and mind..I dont have responsibilities..I dont have to worry bout spilt coffee on the floor or used clothes in the bathroom..Even the ants that run a good length on the floor seem to be happy that pif paf does not come on to them..Nostalgia, one of the other things that I relish completely when I am at mum's place.. memories of how I was a sport when I had to struggle with textbooks and life.. of all the admirations and criticisms that I received.. of how i had thought that marriage would set me free( lol)

When u are a literature student u tend to be more emotional than practical.. thats the general notion.. a cliched opinion.. and how true.. I felt.. but isnt literature life? is it not teaching u what life is and how u got to learn from every experience.. be it love, or plotting, or even work. Today when I see blood relations throwing blames and curses at each other I laugh at everyone who tel me that i hv to be practical.. and by the way what is practicality? is it taking the right decision when u r in a situation? is it taking the path that will lead u to success? is it forsaking what u love and do what u ought to do to save for future generations? ( what do future generations do after us?) they learn from mama papa that they hv to save for their future by slogging all their life.. and we claim that we did all this for them to take rest and for them to stay happy..men and women!!! Human life is not like food chain..!! its not something like recycling!!.. u have it only once and live it only once.. Learn to love each other despite all setbacks and limitations.. why waste time energy and money fighting and trying to settle disputes? by the time we do that it will be time for us to hit our graves..

I have a lot of issues to confront but typing constantly on the keyboard to see magical letters and symbols springing up on computer screens can make u tired.. but let me tell you.. life without interference can be a real treat for people like me..when u want love and when u want to be left alone... often it happens topsy turvy..i have to document certain situations and how i felt when i was in them, but when i get to work i seem to forget.. i can see so many ways lying ahead but i am still standing at the beginning, still choosing which way to go, still taking time to decide the right thing.. exactly what we all are doing.. u want to close ur eyes and go one way but u think of disapproval and disappointments and frowning eyebrows and a sorry figure of yourself.. sometimes I wonder why cant the world come to a stand still and then change..., turn over a new leaf? get rid of everything artificial and stay close to the way god created it. we men and women are drifting away for no good.. its time we realise it and get back home.. ciao!!